PAX Centurion - May / June 2015

Page 56 • PAX CENTURION • June/July 2015 617-989-BPPA (2772) See that mountain? I made it from a mole hill all by myself… By P.O. Jay Moccia Why is it that you settle down with a mate, but settle up with a bartender? H H H H H H H H H I’ve been a cop for so long I had cases in front of the judges who are now portraits in the courthouse. H H H H H H H H H When choosing a restaurant remember, “rustic” means the tables are thisclosetogether, and “intimate” means the lighting is poor. H H H H H H H H H Men only think of three things: Food Sex How do I get the other two between games. H H H H H H H H H Every generation of cops marches off to retirement with the refrain “the job’s gone, kid.” H H H H H H H H H When I wear my issued winter hat, I hope I look like DeNiro in The Deer Hunter. Unfortunately, the fit is so poor I look more like Waldo. H H H H H H H H H Before politicians force body cameras on cops, they better think about scenarios like this: “Councilor, I pulled you over because you’re weaving all over the road. I think you may have had too much to drink.-maybe Mrs Coun- cilor should drive…OH, that isn’t Mrs Councilor?Why yes, sir, this IS a body cam”. File under: “Smile!You’re on Candid (body) Camera!” H H H H H H H H H Thug thug thug, thug thug. Thug thug thug thugthug, THUG. Nope, still not seeing that as a problem…this word, as I use it and understand it, is not some racist dog whistle. It refers to a person who does not comport to the rules of society, and uses violence, brutality and intimi- dation to wreak havoc on his community or fellow citizens. As anyone who reads my drivel notes, I divide the use of this word equally between gangsters (of any color) and Islamo-Fascist terrorists. I will continue to use it in that manner, and no thug will dissuade me. H H H H H H H H H “Uber” is Danish for $%^*# up traffic. H H H H H H H H H A comedian rattles off jokes, a humorist just writes his down. H H H H H H H H H How is it that if a cop is shot, or injured, inevitably some idiot talking head or clueless politician babbles on about the risks involved in Law Enforcement, etc, etc. Stipulated. So, why is that standard not applied to gang bangers and terrorists? Surely they know the possible dangers. H H H H H H H H H When has the simple act of turning a car around become such a task for many drivers, especially the ones that come by MY details??? H H H H H H H H H New note on all day off requests: I.D.C.I.I.I.O.T: I don’t care if it incurs overtime. H H H H H H H H H Sometimes my hair gets so long it looks like a toupee. H H H H H H H H H On my way to court one morning recently, I passed a group of guys drinking on a street corner. I thought to myself, they must be going to a golf tournament or are on vacation. H H H H H H H H H President Obama took up the mantle from disgraced FORMER Attorney General Holder when he too referred to Police as an “occu- pying force”. And to that end, he’s shutting down a program that offers Law Enforcement surplus military equipment. Now I don’t see the need for a tank (YET), but some of the stuff comes in handy when dealing with the criminal element or disruptive protesters. What galls me is the fact that the most mentioned piece of used gear that had Barry and his cronies in a tizzy was: camouflage uniforms. H H H H H H H H H Local activist Jamarhl Crawford is urging the Feds to investigate the Boston Police Department. He claims that the last few Officer involved shootings (OIS) were racist. In a case of never let the facts get in the way, he sent his missive off despite the FACT that the last nine OIS in Boston all involved violent armed criminals or mentally deranged armed individuals, all of whom attacked, shot or shot at BPD Officers. H H H H H H H H H On a related note: after a seven year old boy was hit with a round, during a brazen daylight shooting on Bowdoin St, I congratulate Chief Gross and Mayor Marty Walsh for calling out “activists” and expressing outrage that there is no outrage. A child was shot (not the first in these parts either) and yet, no protest, no march, no vigil, no information forthcoming from the Occupy frauds and their stooges at #blacklivesmatter. It seems these folks only give a crap when it fits their agenda. H H H H H H H H H During a rainstorm, my phone blew up with warnings of flash floods. I thought, how the hell do they know where I am? I guess the Government IS spying on me. Hey NSA, good luck sifting through all this crap. H H H H H H H H H Sometimes I feel like a banana republic dictator. I pick up a rake or shovel and my family disappears. H H H H H H H H H Well, one of America’s greatest athletes, Olympic Gold Medalist Bruce Jenner, wants to become a woman. I guess being on theWheaties box wasn’t enough, now he wants to be on the cover of Tampax. H H H H H H H H H Terrorist THUG (there it is!) Dzokhar Tsarnaev was sentenced to DEATH ,by a Massachusetts jury no less (maybe there is some hope for Liberals) for his role in the Marathon Bombing that left 4 (now 5) dead and hundreds injured. During the penalty phase, relatives of Tsarnaev (excluding his felon/wanted Mother) travelled to Boston on the tax- payer’s dime to defend the tousle haired youth against the Great Satan. They recalled a smiling boy, in awe of his older brother, who cried at the “Lion King” (I’m sure when Scar got it). It took less than 10 years for Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh to ride the needle, I sin- cerely hope the Joker doesn’t reach 30. H H H H H H H H H How is it that every firehouse is always built with adequate parking including a few extra spots for visitors, but Police stations, not so much?